Birth PTSD ....

A friend of mine posted an article on her facebook ...  I thought it should be shared.

Birth Grief And Trauma Are Not Selfish

This is me, I have PTSD stemming from Noah's birth....

I have PTSD from Noah's birth. I always feel crazy saying it - but it's true. Especially being told over and over that Noah had no chance for life. I ended up in the hospital thanks to Pre-Eclampsia and Noah having heart decelerations. I made it clear that if I got nothing else, I at least wanted to be given the chance to hold Noah while he was alive. I realize that may have caused a delay in "saving" him. He was born at 33 weeks, he was the size of a 24 week baby - only 1lb 12.2 oz. 13 3/4 inches long. However, there was a doctor overseeing and telling all the medical staff he worked with that the baby had no chance. Regardless, there are certain basic things you expect at the birth of your child. I didn't expect to have to be rushed in for an emergency c-section, though I wasn't surprised. I didn't expect for the room to be so very silent other than the doctor's orders as she cut me open. I certainly didn't expect to learn of my child being taken from my womb by the time being called out by the anesthesiologist who was sitting by my head. By the time I asked what "Three forty-five" was, and he told me "it's the time your baby was born" ... Noah had already been taken from my womb and rushed to a side room behind a closed door - where I couldn't see or hear or anything... there was no announcement of "It's a Boy!" not even a "Your baby is out and he's being taken by the NICU staff to check his vitals." I had no idea, there was no intention to tell me anything. He was born at 3:45 pm and I didn't see him until after 9pm. They weren't going to let me see him until my legs weren't numb anymore, and I could get up and into a wheelchair.

With Nathan - who was born via planned c-section, at the same hospital, to go into the same NICU (and funny enough he was put in the same spot in the NICU Noah had been) ... I made DB swear he wouldn't leave Nathan's side, that no matter what was going on with me, he would at least be there with Nathan because he shouldn't be alone and scared. And so he did. And when Nathan cried at his birth - I started crying. His birth wasn't what I wanted, but I had very little choice as to having a c-section thanks to the way that I was cut with Noah. There was no option of a VBAC or anything I had wanted for a birth. I didn't have to wait with Nathan until my legs weren't numb anymore, they took me back in the bed, wheeled me right into the NICU. (And he wasn't in an easy spot to take a bed) .. it was a much better birth, still scary... I knew I had another sick baby - but he was crying and he wasn't on a vent ... but Noah was sick (almost died that same week Nathan was born) and having to leave Noah in his hospital room while I went to have a baby certainly didn't aid to my calmness, infact I was a wreck ... but that's another story. 

Kaedyn's birth - however, was amazingly what I wanted for a c-section ... and the only one done by my OB that I trusted and loved, and the only one done in my home town.  We were laughing and joking while he was doing the c-section, Kaedyn cried and screamed - LOL - and peed everywhere ... we got to take pictures and everything... I was left alone with him for about a half hour or so, in the recovery room ... just him and me.  I undressed him and I counted all his fingers and toes...  I remember when they put him in my arms, he stopped crying.... and he looked at me.  He was amazing.  It was the perfect ending to my having kids.  

Allergies, Allergies, Oh My ....

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Here is Kaedyn doing his Asthma blowing test.  

Facebook Status: At Kaedyn's allergy appt....Kaedyn is allergic to every nut there is almost....Walnut 2, Cashew 3, Pistachio 3, Peanut 3, Hazelnut 3, Pecan 2, no reaction to Macadamia Nut, Brazil Nut, & Almond... The numbers go from 0 to 6 .. 6 being most severe... That's the blood test results.... He is still getting spot testing...

So they decided to test him for half strength Almond and Brazil Nut...   along with some food panels ...  (they were ONLY going to the two half strength nuts today - I guess they don't carry a oil for Macadamia Nuts.)  But I talked her into doing other stuff.  I didn't feel it was right to keep him off all his allergy meds for two tests.   Plus, it's not just this past week, it's all of the next week too cuz he has more tests on Tuesday.

Getting the tests done..... 

This was at 5 minutes and 10 minutes .... 

By the time they did the measuring - the Almond spot actually decreased.  They have it as a +1 but it was more like a +3.  

These results, also - are from negative to 4 being most severe.  

So far, this is everything that he's allergic to.  

Now - can someone explain to me how my child can be super allergic to Peanut Butter - like AS allergic to Peanut Butter as he is to Cashews and - he - doesn't - react ... not to peanut butter.  

Guess This Explains It A Bit .... 

Allergic Reactions

A person with nut or peanut allergies could have a mild reaction — or it could be more severe. An allergic reaction usually happens right away, but some people can have another reaction a few hours after they eat a nut or peanut.

Here are some of the problems an allergic reaction can cause:

• Skin: Skin reactions are the most common type of food allergy reactions. They can take the form of itchy, red, bumpy rashes (hives); eczema; or redness and swelling around the mouth or face. A rash can happen when a nut or peanut comes in contact with the skin, even without eating it.
• Gastrointestinal system: Symptoms can take the form of belly cramps, nausea, vomiting, or diarrhea.
• Respiratory system: Symptoms can range from a runny or stuffy nose, itchy, watery eyes, and sneezing to the triggering of asthma with coughing and wheezing.
• Cardiovascular system: A person may feel lightheaded or even faint.

In the most serious cases, a nut or peanut allergy can cause anaphylaxis (say: an-uh-fuh-LAK-sis). Anaphylaxis is a sudden, life-threatening allergic reaction. A person's blood pressure can drop, breathing tubes can narrow, and the tongue can swell.

People at risk for this kind of a reaction have to be very careful and need a plan for handling emergencies, when they might need to use special medicine to stop these symptoms from getting worse.

So I guess that Tree Nuts (Cashews) and Peanuts are very much separate allergies.  Kaedyn has anaphylaxis towards cashews.  Doesn't mean he will towards Peanuts - because he doesn't.  

But he does have a lot of the other reactions.  He gets itchy, he gets hives, he has eczema, stuffy nose, etc - but with all his allergies - it's going to be hard to pin point.  HOWEVER ....  I guess we know and we'll just have to keep an eye on him.  Without him reacting - with life threatening ways - we really don't need to become a peanut free home.  

The Monkey in the Asylum Day 1 & 2

First, I have some catching up on this blog.

Second, I don't know what to entitle this blog....

Mystery Diagnosis Duex ?

I don't know.   I guess I'll go with what I figure out in a few.

Regardless, I feel like I have gone through this story a hundred times already if not five hundred.

Yesterday, Nathan was complaining about his back hurting, a lot.  I haven't actually ever heard him say "a lot" before.  But he did.  He said his sides were hurting too, mostly complaining about his right side.  So .... he asked me for some medication - also something he doesn't normally do ...  and he said "Hurry" which is another thing that made me go hummmmm.....  never done that before either.

So ....  fast forward a little bit.  I gave him a suppository thinking he might be constipated.  He pooped a little, pooped a little more... said he felt better.

But he spent time on my bed in clear pain.

It was later that night - when we were getting him ready for bed... that I noticed that his right scrotum was very red, very swollen and painful to the touch.  Yeah.  That can't be good.  Got him settled for bed.

I called the next morning (Thursday morning) and got him an appointment to see one of the doctors at the clinic late in the evening.

Nathan was complaining he was in pain again.  Back and sides again.   He wanted to lay down and use my phone to play on and I told him it was almost dead....

He wasn't amused ....

At this point he was kinda wallowing in pain.  It was almost time to go to the Doctors ....

Got dressed and got silly!

He gave Mommy a tiny flower she put in her hair.  But look at the smiles!

And then he melted down on the grass and was in pain :(

Nathan was not HAPPY at all about having to put on hospital bracelets ...

  We got there,  He was looked over ... she wanted us to go to the ER to make sure that his testicle wasn't twisted.   So we did, and he got an ultrasound done.  Everything looked good.

Testicles were not twisted and so we were given the OK to go home, was just waiting for his first dose of antibiotics ....

Once we got the meds, and the discharge papers ...  we hit the road Jack.   There was a very beautiful sunset going on ....  so I had to take a few pictures

He was diagnosed with a UTI and Epididymitis (which is an infection in your scrotum around your testicle.

Kaedyn at home reading over Nathan's potential Zombie Virus

Me - well I was getting ready for bedtime meds - can't you tell from the tube extension around my neck?

Sadly after meds, Nathan got sick around 10:45 PM and kept getting sick until about 3 AM.  He kept throwing up his meds.  I even gave him some anti-nausea meds and he still threw up for an couple hours after.

Ugh.... Poor Baby ......   We considered taking him back in but thought it was probably the meds, so we figured we'd just call in the AM to see if they wanted to switch it.

Continue to:  The Monkey In The Asylum * Day 3 * The ER 

Oh Nuts!!!!

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Last night was really scary.  Like - BEYOND - scary.

Before I get into it - Kaedyn has been through allergy testing.  Back in October of 2011 (when Kaedyn was just 3 years old) ...  he was eating candy corn and had a major allergic reaction where he had monster sized hives all over his body.  He went through Allergy testing and I talked about it in this update (UPDATES: KAEDYN) in April of 2012 ....

So this is Kaedyn yesterday afternoon - before .... it .... all.... happened.

Yesterday was - of course - Rare Disease Day - their thing is jeans for genes and wearing jeans and having jean ribbons .... so of course it's important with us because both Noah and Nathan have rare disorders.

So we had a bag of Caramel Popcorn with Almonds and Cashews.

So I'm going through stuff and trying to organize my bedroom and Kaedyn comes rushing in and his lips are like CRAZY swollen ....  and I put down what I'm doing and he's about to burst into tears.  He's like "Mom my mouth feels weird" ... I said "I can see that, what happened?"  I'm asking him if he got hurt - if he fell - if someone kicked him in the mouth, if he teeth fell out... cuz in my mind, this is OBVIOUSLY some sort of traumatic event that happened to his mouth.

He's like "Mom, NO!  I ate that banana looking thing."

Now I'm thinking he went outside - because he had been in and out all day - and he picked something off a plant that was poisonous to humans, and I need to get him to the ER.

He's like "No MOM! That bag of popcorn."  So I tell him to show me and follow him out, meanwhile I am yelling for DB.  "HONEY WE HAVE A PROBLEM!!"

He hands me the bag of popcorn and I start dumping it out into a bowl.  He described it as ... the white/yellow curved things that looked like a banana."

I'm not kidding, the thought of "What did you think you were eating Runts?" crossed my mind.

So I pick up an almond and he's like "No not that one"

So then I pick up a cashew and he's like "Yeah that's it...."

So DB is like, we're going to the ER now.  He asked me to keep an eye on dinner because he was in the middle of cooking.  He literally grabbed Kaedyn and ran out the door.  Didn't grab a jacket for him or anything, barely got his shoes.  So I walked to the bedroom, and I looked down at my shoes, and I thought - WHY am I staying here?

So I yell for the older kids to finish dinner - as I'm slipping into my shoes.  I run out the door hoping they haven't left yet.  So I see he's still buckling Kaedyn in his carseat and he sees me, says "Are you coming with?"  I said "Yeah."  My phone is dying, I didn't even grab my sweatshirt so all my psoriasis is exposed (well not all of it, but my arms and my chest and my face because I'm wearing a short sleeved shirt.)

.... and I'm cold.

But DB drives to the hospital which is 5 minutes away - shorter time frame to sit there and call 911 and wait for an ambulance.  So he's driving with his hazards on because he's speeding and I realize I'm not even buckled in.  I'm too busy sitting sideways in my seat watching Kaedyn's face swell up.

This is Kaedyn right before we left the house.  You can see his lips are swollen and he has the red lower face, like a beard.  It was hard getting a pic of that, but he had a very distinct line from the bottom of his nose to his neck - it was all red.

DB drops us (Kaedyn and I) off at the door and I grab him and run in.  They get him checked in, and then he gets taken back almost right away.  They do vitals on him, they are getting a room clean at that moment and he's going in that room.   So when it's clean (or almost clean - they were making the bed when we walked in) ... we got taken back.  Kaedyn is just scared .... terrified.  We already warned him they would have to give him a shot (epipen) ...

We had an epipen in the house, because of DB's allergy to Lobster.  However, didn't think it would be a good idea to use it on Kaedyn.  Adult dose.

They get him in the room and all sorts of things start happening.  They wanted him to talk to hear if his throat was swelling and he just wouldn't do it.

One of the first questions we were asked, was ...  "are his lips normally that big?" ....... um NO.

They wanted to get an IV in and give him a shot of epinephrine ....

Here he is getting the epinephrine shot in his leg.

His lower lip was BEYOND swollen.  He was starting to get tiny little hives all over his face, his left eye was turning pink/red.

You can see in this picture that he's starting to improve.  His face is starting to clear up...

 They gave him the epinephrine, some steroids, some benedryl, and with all the meds on bored, he got super tired.

This is a comparison pic.... the top one is when we first got there, the bottom left while he was sleeping, and the bottom right awhile after ... you can see it slowly got a little better and then noticeably got better.

Here is a collage for the scary night :(

After he woke up he asked to watch YouTube....

And I thought his upper lip had completely gone down and it was just his lower lip, until.... he... opened .... his .... mouth....

We were there 4 hours under observation.  But since he was getting better and NOT having a rebound reaction ...  they sent us home.

The nurse gave him a pack of G.I.Joe guys when we left.  She's like "I should have asked you first but he did so good and he really was my bravest patient today."

First we had to go down to the ER Pharmacy - because we were not going home without an epi pen.  They called down prior to our being discharge, and the nurse walked us down.  She told us it should already be ready.  So get down there, hand them the slip, they go - "oh yeah, we got a call about this" ... "It'll be about 20 minutes."   Seriously????

We have to wait, we don't have a choice.

Kaedyn:  "This is going to take forever."
Kaedyn: "I'm bored!"
Kaedyn:  "I just want to go home Mom, I'm so hungry."

The green ones are Kaedyn's - the yellow one is DB's...

We stopped at the store to get him a lunchable and a few other things, because that's what he wanted to eat.  Since he did such a good job, I figured he deserved it.  And he wanted some apple juice.   (you can see both in the picture below on the arm of the couch.) ...

(Added March 1st) So began the fight.  We got home at 11pm and the fight to get ALL the kids to bed started.  So begun the Kaedyn vs. Mom - what was going to fall asleep first, fight.  Well, Mom lost.  I woke up every 2 hours having nightmares and at 4am - this is what I finally found.

So I took the Frankenstein Laptop, put it away, and tucked him in.

So let's talk about this new allergy of his.

He was tested in 2012 - and NOT ONE FOOD ALLERGY came up.  Not one.

So I started researching ....  even though I have the same allergy.  I can eat peanuts and almonds but I am allergic to all other nuts.

List of Tree Nuts

And now we have to really look into getting him one of these.  Also need to get him into his Ped on Monday and get allergy testing done again - ASAP.  

So out of curiosity .... I looked up the ingredients of Candy Corn ... because that's what he was eating when he got his horrible hive reaction in October 2011.

So ........

Do you see what I see?????

"This product was manufactured in a facility where .... TREE NUTS .... are used in the production of other products."

Yep.

SO WHY OH WHY OH WHY .... OH WHY ... didn't they pick up on the TREE NUT allergy when he got tested in 2012????   WHY???

It's scary biznitz ....  Allergies are a SERIOUS issue in our house.  I'm allergic to a lot of things.  The majority of fruits - probably because they are tree dwelling.  I am not allergic to grapes, maybe because they are grown on vines instead?   I am allergic to Tree Nuts also.  Again, I can eat peanuts and almonds but not the rest of the tree nuts.  I am allergic to so much pollen. I am allergic to grass, animals, soaps and other products.  DB is allergic to shellfish and lobster.  He has to carry an epipen as you saw above.  So yeah.  Allergies are no joke in our family.